What We Drink (other than wine): PROTEIN

Ragers,

If you are like us, you likely are on the mad dash to consume MORE protein and less carbs in order to look slim and fit in middle age.  They keep telling us carbs kill -- potatoes are for pigs; corn is for cows.  But how in the hell do you get all the protein in?  It sets us into a middle RAGE.

We like meat, okay, but we're not huge carnivores. And we're really really sick of chicken. Ick.  I just want a big fat burger without the bun!

Well, to get that protein, you have to supplement and drink a protein shake.  Yes ragers, we don't just drink wine.

A lot of protein shakes/powders are totally gross which is why you can never stick to them.  However, at the GNC store, recently, I discovered the absolute best one that really is delicious. I have it everyday for breakfast now because I never know what the day will bring in terms of freaking protein.

HERE IT IS:

Performance Series MAX Protein (chocolate)
High protein (22g), Low carbs and calories, gluten/wheat free.
It's about 35 smacks the GNC store.

AND (you have to get this to go with it -- delish)

PB2 powdered peanut butter
Tastes like peanut butter (yum) but 85% less fat and calories
2 tablespoons give you an additional 5 grams of protein.

Enjoy! It will taste like a peanut butter cup but give you all that protein you supposedly need in your 40s!

Best Undereye Cream

Ok, ragers. I know you were out late last night boozing it up. As such, your eyes currently look like crap. And this is, of course, the area where the wrinkles begin.. and stay.

First and foremost, the ONLY and I mean ONLY way to really get rid of those crows feet is Botox.  TSCMFL.  This shit changed my fucking life.  This is an acronym I will ONLY use for top life changing events in middle age.  Trust me. I use it sparingly.

Now I know not everyone wants to go near the needle nor spend the money, so for those weaklings out there,  here are my top recs for under eye creams.  They do help, it is very important to keep the undereye area hydrated as we get older.  Don't forget -- morning and night.  Then you can rage on.

1. Laura Mercier Flawless Skin Repair Eye Cream: I'm a huge Laura Mercier fan, and this stuff is smooth and silky and effective as hell. It's pricey though. About 65 bucks.

2. Origins Ginzing Under Eye Cream:  I am also a huge Origins fan. I love their mushroom line, and I love their tinted moisturizer.  This eye cream is a nice one and gets rave reviews.  It's about 30 bucks. A cheaper option for the Middle Rager who rages less than we do.

3. The ROC Undereye Night Treatment:  This is a good staple. It has retinol which is the key ingredient to getting rid of fine lines. I have used it with some success, and it's only 22 bones.

ASK WEEBS: Battling the Batwings

Hi Ragers,

It's triceps time!

Time to battle those batwings!

It's that stubborn area we hate and never quite seem to be able to tone.  Hence, the wings.... so gross.  Well today, we have our guest columnist, Weebs, yoga/pilates instructor extraordinaire, to help us whip those wings into shape.

Weebs says:

To tone the triceps, first try tricep dips.  Bend your elbows on a bench or even a chair and extend your legs (or bend your knees for beginners) and do dips down as far as you can go.  These are challenging, but they work.  Try 3 sets of 12.  Then later, 3 sets of 15.

One of the best toners are arm circles.  These are easy to do anywhere even for the Ragers out there that travel all the time.  Get off that couch and stand up; extend your arms out to the side so you now look like a T.  Let your fingers guide you into small (small girls!) circles forward for 10 counts and then backward circles for 10 counts.  Then go back to forward circles for 10.  Do these for a total of 100 counts. In my class, we do 160. Work up to this number.

Finally, the old school push up again!  But this time, pull your elbows in toward to sides so you are using your triceps not your chest.  These are a killer. Try 3 sets of 12 reps.

RAGE ON but don't forget to tone up!

Feel free to send me comments/ questions on the site. I'll be back next week with more!

Weebs

Get out of my Inbox

Out of my League:

By and large, I've heard about this problem from my girlfriends, and it appears to be widespread and pervasive in the U.S. -- especially for those who have experimented with online dating.  (I have not partaken because I'm prone to strong attraction by i) narcissists and ii) sociopaths so my therapist said I have to stay offline a bit to avoid the same).

Here's the thing: These guys who email my 30 something/40 something girlfriends requesting a date
are very old and short and bald and creepy looking.  Like the sociopaths I fear. Many of which are 20 years their senior.

AS IF.  Come on.  Do you think we really want to date septuagenarians in our sexual prime?

You know when you are out of someone's league.  I wouldn't email Brad Pitt for crying out loud.  You need to stay out of our inbox. It's annoying and sets us into a middle RAGE.

Ex-boyfriends:

In addition, if you are an ex-boyfriend who has in the past exhibited extremely bad behavior, also, stay out of my inbox. It is annoying (at best) and traumatizing (at worst).  Recently, a boyfriend (who did me very wrong) from my early college days found me and emailed me twice  (Note: if I don't respond to you the first time, don't follow up with another email. I'm deliberately ignoring you.) wanting to reconnect and attached a photo of himself to said email.  Narcissist!

Now that is traumatizing.  I do not need to see you 20 years later especially when you were such a major douchebag in college.  I doubt much has changed since then.  As such, mean ex-boyfriends, stay out of my inbox.

You know you don't belong there.

Christine

WHY are you telling me this?

I was just telling Heather today how sick I am of men making weird and inappropriate comments to me.

Examples:

• "I like your boobs.  They are really nice."  WHY are you telling me this?
  
• (The man I used to date)  "I used to date 24-year old bartenders.  A lot of women hit on me at work. In fact, of the 5,000 women I have done business with over the years, I would say 4,900 of them have hit on me. Even women who report to me hit on me." Again, WHY are you telling me this?

Today, in fact, a man with whom I am friends:

• "I get erect easily .... especially when any girl flirts with me." WHY are you telling me this?

As Heather rightly noted, it's like dealing with her children with these men. You have to say "Now ___, these are inappropriate comments, and you can't talk to people like this. If you say that again, you're going to have a time out.

Honestly, I thought the old school locker rooms were for this kind of talk. Go in your man cave or go talk to you guys friends about this crap. I don't want to hear it. It sets me into a middle RAGE.

Christine

Cure for the Rage?

Could this be a cure for the rage?  (the bad kind of rage only, of course!) If you're like me, you've noticed some changes in yourself that seemed to coincide with your crossing the precipice into the 40's.  Here are a few test questions:

Have you experienced in the last six months any of the following:

• A feeling you're constantly racing from one task to the next?
• Feeling wired yet tired?
• A quickness to feel anger or rage?
• Memory lapses or feeling distracted?
• Loss of stamina, particularly in the afternoon from 2-5?
• Insomnia or difficulty staying asleep?
• Salt cravings?
• Sugar cravings?
• Brain fog? 
• Achy joints?
• Thinning hair?
• Additional few pounds that you just can't lose?
• Heavy or irregular periods?
• And yes, vaginal dryness and/or decreased libido?

Answer yes to a few (um, or most like I did)?  Read on..

The Hormone Cure: Reclaim Balance, Sleep, Sex Drive and Vitality Naturally with the Gottfried Protocol, by Dr. Sara Gottfried is an amazing resource to help find the possible reasons for these symptoms and potential solutions.  I mean, read the title -- who doesn't want all of those things?!?  Yes, please!

Here are a few things I love so far about this book.  First, this woman is legit.  Harvard/MIT/UCSF trained, board certified gynecologist.  She practiced traditional medicine for many years before realizing that, after seeing so many women with similar symptoms (as well as her own!), a more integrative approach was necessary.  Second, it's all about balance.  Balancing our lives helps us to be our best.  Third, for health/medical nerds like me (if I had the stomach for it, I'd go back to school to be a doctor!), it gives fantastic scientific background on every aspect of the uber-important endocrine system and the role each of the major hormones plays in our body, particularly as we age.  Fourth, Dr Gottfried is all about making lifestyle changes first and foremost, then supplementation, then, only if needed, bioidentical hormones.

Give this one a try - you will be sucked in like me.  I'll keep you posted on my own investigation.  Take charge of your health, ragers!   We need to be at our absolute best to rage on for the next 20, 30, 40 years or more!

Heather

Just say SOMETHING

Today's post will not be about cool products or the best of Facebook cocktail recipes.

Today I am in a middle RAGE about something --- people who never respond.

I'm sick of people not responding to my emails especially when I ask them a direct and targeted question like "Are we still on for dinner tomorrow night?" No response.

Stop fucking up my calendar. Answer me.

I'm so sick of the nonresponse.  It takes two seconds to hit the reply button. I know I send a lot of meaningless emails on a daily basis, but geez, if I ask you a question, just respond. I mean, don't you have to be "responsive" at work and answer your work emails?

Just say SOMETHING.

It can even be bad news. I don't care. Or, it might be half of one sentence "will get back to you."

And for those of you whose voicemail box is always full (because you are just sooo much busier than the rest of us), clear it!

I don't care.  Just respond, and quit setting me into a MIDDLE rage.